We all agree empathy is a good idea. But not truly understanding what empathy is and what it isn’t gets in our way and causes more harm, burnout, and disconnection.
Empathy is NOT:
- Being nice
- Giving in
- People pleasing
- Making everybody happy
- Avoiding hard truths to ensure comfort
- Unanimous consensus (or satisfaction)
- Hiding information
- Doing someone’s work for them
Empathy is:
- Listening
- Getting curious
- Knowing your triggers, strengths, and blindspots (and those of your team!)
- Take a beat
- Making space and time
- Enabling everyone to have a voice as input (even if you make the final call)
- Transparency in decisions, especially the tough ones
- Letting go of ego or righteous indignation to see another’s point of view
- Knowing that good ideas come from anywhere
- Admitting when we don’t know the answer – and rallying others to bring their ideas forth
- Having the tough conversation as soon as possible, with grace and respect
- Making clear decisions…AND
- …not being afraid to course correct if you’re proven wrong or get new information
- Seeing the whole person, both inside and outside of work
- Meeting people where they are
- Creating moments of joy and levity, even when the work is hard
Empathy is not doing FOR. It’s being WITH.
How does empathy show up in your team or organization?
Photo credit: Desola Lanre-Ologun on Unsplash
